What did I tell you

What did I tell you, about volcanoes and Glaciers? Oh yea, I said they are in eternal war. Well guess what happened. Soon after the feast ended, the Great god Cëíme'éča'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå (Funny (Humorous) little fire island god) or Eyjafjallajökull created massive ash clouds, disrupting air travel, ruining economies (excepting New Zealand), and worse of all, stranding American Tourists in Europe, annoying the European's arrogance. This volcano god happens to be under his eternal enemy Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå (intelligent little fire island cold god), a glacial god. This god is one holding back Cëíme'éča'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå from awaking the much more powerful god Cëíme'éčä'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå (Funny big fire island god), or Katla. If Cëíme'éčä'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå is awoken, a much bigger and more disruptive explosion will occur. As such I am constructing an altar for Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå right now, but I need a sacrifice. Don't worry, Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå is not a demanding god and only wants unicorns. So if you have a spare forest unicorn lying around, I would greatly accept it, as I don't have time to go hunting right now. Thank you. Also, the only very demanding Gods are the most important, who feel they are too important to have to choose their wives with the rest of the gods, and want them as soon as possible.