What did I tell you

What did I tell you, about volcanoes and Glaciers? Oh yea, I said they are in eternal war. Well guess what happened. Soon after the feast ended, the Great god Cëíme'éča'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå (Funny (Humorous) little fire island god) or Eyjafjallajökull created massive ash clouds, disrupting air travel, ruining economies (excepting New Zealand), and worse of all, stranding American Tourists in Europe, annoying the European's arrogance. This volcano god happens to be under his eternal enemy Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå (intelligent little fire island cold god), a glacial god. This god is one holding back Cëíme'éča'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå from awaking the much more powerful god Cëíme'éčä'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå (Funny big fire island god), or Katla. If Cëíme'éčä'údpóhkloľľünääkůíjå is awoken, a much bigger and more disruptive explosion will occur. As such I am constructing an altar for Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå right now, but I need a sacrifice. Don't worry, Cëínüíčä'údpóhkloľľüčacetëmůnääkůíjå is not a demanding god and only wants unicorns. So if you have a spare forest unicorn lying around, I would greatly accept it, as I don't have time to go hunting right now. Thank you. Also, the only very demanding Gods are the most important, who feel they are too important to have to choose their wives with the rest of the gods, and want them as soon as possible.

The truth about the New World Order

As announced in my previous post, it is time for people to learn the truth, not lies from the government. So in my second installment, I will tell you about the New World Order, and its connections Politics, Catholicism, Freemasons, and Demons.

In short, the New World Order (which will now be called the NWO or nwo) is an organization that is vying to rule the world. While the seeds of its have been planted for centuries, the League of Nations was the first attempt to create. While an utter failure, it proved that such an organization is possible. Then, in a secret meeting between the leaders of the world, in April of 1945, the document was sealed and the NWO was born. Yes, the United Nations is the NWO. But how does everything else fit into this? Well, once the NWO was founded, they realized they needed to infiltrate all parts of society. While scratching their heads, wondering how to do this, they were approached by the Traitor to humanity, Mr Menyasszony A Kutyák. He offered them help, in the form of his organization, the Freemasons, humans dedicated to making the Demons rule once again. The NWO gladly accepted, and began to unfold their plans. While they fought fake wars to try to dispel the truth, the Freemasons took over the Catholic Church. While never gaining any high ranking positions, their use of mind control, demonic rituals let them control in all but name. While some leaders tried to fight back, they were quickly killed off or framed, soon ending resistance. Next the NWO took on the media. By controlling various newspapers and Journal, such as the New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and The National Inquirer, they thought they had a tight control. But then came TV and Movies. Once again the Freemasons were called, this time to mind control actors, turning them into the slaves of the NWO. Now the NWO is waiting, slowly destroying us and our ideals, making us into one nation. They used the European Union as their test site. It worked to well, until the Valiant Efforts of Greece threatened to destroy it. Now they are trying to keep even that together.

Other people have fought against the NWO too. For example many "rouge states" what to destroy it. I myself have attacked it multiple times, including at the first meeting. While I did disrupt it, I did not count on having to fight hundreds of Royal Mounted Police Men, members of the LAPD, the FBI, and ninjas trained in a monastery in Tibet. I was eventually captured, yet I did escape. Also, a few years ago their was a direct assult on New Sweden and I was captured once again by the NWO. After being tortured I was eventually freed by agents from a country I will not name for its protection.

Now You may be wondering what you can do to help. It is quite simple. Support nations frowned on by the NWO, non-conformists like Iran, North Korea, and Venezuela. Teach your family, friends, coworkers, and dogs about the NWO. Assassinate politicians, Freemasons, Movie Stars, and Other people affiliated with the New World Order. Blow up NWO buildings and ruin their "peacekeeping" operations. Remember, the NWO causes problems so that they can solve them and gain people's respect. So don't give them your respect. Thank you for reading, and have a nice anti-NWO day.

The Festival of Fools ends on April 13.

The Truth about Global Warming

All this time, the world government has been feeding you lies, in order to hide the fact that the new world order is attempting to fulfill the Prophecy. These things include evolution, global warming, Freemasons, the Knight Templar, the Catholic Church, Gravity, the World being Round, the Earth revolving around the sun, and many other assumed "truths". But these are lies. And it is up to the knowledgeable, such as me, to keep the public informed with the truth. Today I will explain Global Warming.

Global Warming does not exist. Just live with it. Rather, the Glaciers are retreating because the Glacier Gods are exhaling. That is what causes the glacial winds. As the exhale, they become smaller. Soon they will once again inhale, and grow. but they will not grow as large, and will inhale weaker, because of the volcano gods striking while they are weak. See the volcano gods have been fighting the Glacier Gods since the beginning of time. At first the volcano gods were winning in this eternal war, but eventually the Glacier Gods made an alliance with the Lightning Gods, and created life. Hence the Glacier Gods are also the Gods of life. And for the last few billion years, they have been winning. Occasionally the Volcano Gods struck back, but for the most part they have been held back. But the Glacier Gods feel forgotten, and as everyone knows, you only have power over the those who believe in you. Therefore during this last exhalation, they haven't been able to defend themselves as well as they should have, and the volcano gods began to warm up the atmosphere at a greater rate, while also making the Glacier gods have trouble inhaling. It also seems that the volcano gods have made an alliance with the earth gods, in a combine effort to destroy all life on Earth. That is what accounts for the increase of earthquakes this year. Neither the Earth gods, nor the Volcano Gods, like the Glacier God's creation, life. So they want to destroy it. Now in order to save the world, we need to renew the Glacier Gods' power. To do this, we must feed the Greatest of the Gods. What the gods need fed to them are the Hearts of young, pretty, female, virgins, taken from their living flesh with an ice knife, under the full moon, on the Head of the God's palace, on top of an alter made of the bones of the most sacred animals: mountain goats, klipspringers, yaks, and trilobites. While I have been constructing these altars for the last few hundred years, I need volunteers to be sacrificed. They must volunteer themselves and be a willing sacrifice. Under no circumstances must they have any doubts about doing this, or that it is right. If you happen to fulfill the requirements (under the age of eighteen, pretty, virgin, female, willing, and believing in the Glacier Gods) then please contact me). You will go down in history as a true hero for humanity.



In other news, the festival of fools lasts until April 13.