Peace Talks

You might be wondering where I have been the last month or so.  This time it wasn't jail, or Mongolia.  I have been in Cairo working on peace talks with the United States.  Though the meeting are to be confidential until 2013, I may tell you the terms we agreed to.  I am to stop insulting the Americans.  I am to have a better human rights record, meaning no more torturing terrorists (hypocritical Americans, wait I didn't mean that.  Americans don't torture terrorists, anymore).  I am to stop stealing oil from Norway.  I am to hold elections in July.  Fair Elections.  What do you mean our last elections weren't fair?  I am to build a missile defense program to protect my people from Russians.  I am to quit saying that I am an immortal Demon Slayer.  I am to stop promoting obesity by holding the Swedish fish festival.  I am to stop attacking Sweden.  I am to let people come freely into my borders.  I am to join the EU.  I am to stop my use of the þ and the ð.  I am to add the Star Spangled Banner and America the Beautiful to my music on the Wyrm News.  I am to allow people to make decisions.  I am to force Floppy+Bros to make America Overpowered  I WW3, the New Swedish Way.  I am to suck up to America like the rest of Europe.  I am to be the example to the rest of Europe by becoming the 51st state of America.  Wait I wasn't supposed to say that.  In return I will not get invaded by America.  If you are wondering how they got me to agree to these things I must say that I am not allowed to disclose the fact that I was deprived of sleep, water boarded, drugged and had my signiture forged.  Well that is why I have been gone.

Vacation

I do not have time to report on the Swedish Fish Festival. I must leave now. They are after me. I will be back hopefully after He-who-houses-terrorist-sticks takes over the regime. I must see some old friends, Now. I will explain la...

The Scumbag is dead. Long live The Orgainzation. Long live Heinrich Von Kathar. Death to the True Evil Empire. Wait, how do you change the labels? I wonder if this is the button that does it. Yes I think it is. Hey your supoosed to be dead. Don't press that bu...

I told you so...

Well He-who-houses-terrorist-sticks chose Hillary Clinton as his Secretary of State. So my prediction was almost right. He chose someone even worse than Osama Bin Laden. Hilliary Clinton is evil. And a Walmart Executive. She probably worked for Disney too. Obama should have chosen Monica Lewinsky if he couldn't choose Osama Bin Laden. That would be a slap in the face for Clinton. And Clinton (the other one) probaly would hang out at the White House way too much. Next I told people to protect thier oil. Then $100,000,000 of oil was stolen. I told you so. Well that is all for this post.